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Red11 REDitorial

Published: 19 MAR 2003 Newcastle's European dream ended (Reuters) Wed 19 Mar, 09:57 PM NEWCASTLE (Reuters) - Newcastle United have been knocked out of the Champions League after suffering a 2-0 defeat by Barcelona. Arsenal out of Champions League (Reuters) Wed 19 Mar, 09:54 PM VALENCIA, Spain (Reuters) - Arsenal have been knocked out of the Champions League after John Carew struck twice to earn Valencia a 2-1 victory at home. I'M REMINDED OF THAT SONG by Pete Hargreaves The thought that went through my mind when the final whistle went in Spain tonight was of that song from the 1950's...... "And a sparrow farted in Barclay Square". I bet you could hear that sparrow fart. I bet there was an audible silence everywhere south of Watford. Other than in my match reports I don't often make mention of our opponents. But tonight has to be an exception. That complete tosser, Obscene Wanker, the Arsewipe manager, has had his arrogant words shoved fairly and squarely up his arse tonight and I, for one, am quite pleased. No, I'm f**king delighted. The cockney gobshites now realise (I'm sure they didn't before) just how difficult it is to win the European Cup, never mind the Treble. Perhaps they now realise just how great was the achievement of Manchester United in 1999. Though being cockney gobshites they would never admit it. When I was a boy my grandad (a 'reasonable' man) used to say to me "You can always tell a cockney, but you can't tell him much". Well tonight, grandad, I'm telling the cockney gobshites that they aren't quite as good as they think, or said (arrogant tossers), they are. You've got to laugh, haven't you. Arsenal, Newcastle United (and others, but I've forgotten who!!!!) have really terrorised Europe haven't they. My f**king arse they have. Stick to the small competitions Arsewipes and Crybabies (of yes, I saw them crying on the television again tonight). Leave the big stuff to the men. Keep the faith, Pete Copyright © 2003 by Pete Hargreaves. All rights reserved. Not to be reproduced without permission of the author.